Do Jilters Fare Better Than the Jilted?

Parental Alienation

Another question that emerges regarding the relationship between estrangement frequency and adverse psychological outcomes pertains to the possible differentiated outcomes associated with being the one who cuts others off versus being the one who is getting jilted.

A recent study on parent/child estrangements (which are, unfortunately, quite common) partly addresses this question. In a 2018 article published in theJournal of Social Work Practice, Kylie Agllias studied the emotional, behavioral, and social outcomes of adult children who had initiated estrangements with theirparents. This methodology allowed for an assessment of whether jilters in such scenarios fare alright.

In fact, generally speaking, they don’t. Participants largely reported that they regularly longed for the social, emotional, and fiscal support that they’d had before the estrangements took place. These jilters also reported that the estrangements had negative impacts on their relationships with other family members, work colleagues, friends, and intimate partners.

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Dark Responses to Social Transgression and the Face of Revenge

Parental Alienation

Dark Responses to Social Transgression and the Face of Revenge

One of our variables that behaved a bit differently from the others pertained to revenge. Wanting to plot and implement revenge against someone due to a personal transgression can be particularly pernicious. In our Results section, we dug deep into factors associated with predicting the desire to get revenge against the perceived transgressor.

Generally speaking, the best prediction of wanting to implement revenge pertained to scores on our measure of the Dark Triad (Narcissism, Psychopathy, and Machiavellianism). Simply: Participants who scored high on measures of the Dark Triad were likely to report wanting to get back at (or to plot revenge against) the perceived transgressor.

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How Gaslighting And Emotional Abuse Affects Sexual Assault Survivors

Parental Alienation

When someone claims that your own body is lying to you, it can majorly mess with your head.

But when you constantly face accusations from multiple sources, you start feeling insane.

Many abuse victims experience this type of gaslighting on a daily basis, not just from their abuser(s), but also from loved ones, law enforcement officers, and even strangers.

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Pseudo self-forgiveness and threat to belonging

Parental Alienation

Effective processing of a transgression must involve accepting responsibility for one’s wrongdoing. However accepting responsibility may mean increasing the threat of social exclusion which offenders face as a result of their transgression, yet humans are fundamentally motivated to avoid this type of threat. Pseudo self-forgiveness is the use of minimization of harm, denial of wrongdoing, or victim derogation in order to release oneself from guilt and shame. This research examines the defensive psychological process of pseudo self-forgiveness and the impact of threat to belonging on a transgressor’s engagement with this defensive response in both an experimental setting and real life. Study 1 used a lab based approach, manipulating the threat to belonging with an ostracism task. Ostracized participants minimized harm to the victim, reported less shame, regret and self-anger and less desire to reconcile with the victim. Study 2 followed participants over the 11 days after committing an interpersonal transgression…

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Perceptions of Social Transgressions in Adulthood

Parental Alienation

People may react differently when individuals of different ages commit a social faux pas. Younger (22 to 35 years old) and older (65 to 77 years old) participants read vignettes where age of characters committing social transgressions varied (young vs. old). Participants rated whether the offended person would respond with engagement, confrontational, and avoidant behaviors and how much people would blame or forgive the transgressor. Multilevel models revealed endorsement of avoidant behaviors with older transgressors, confrontational behaviors with younger transgressors, and engagement behaviors with both. Levels of blame and forgiveness mediated this association, with less blame and greater forgiveness of older adults. Discussion focuses on the social input model and why adults may regulate reactions to interpersonal problems with older adults.

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Power and Revenge

Parental Alienation

We took an individual differences approach to explain revenge tendencies in powerholders. Across four experimental studies, chronically powerless individuals sought more revenge than chronically powerful individuals following a high power episode (Studies 1 and 2), when striking a powerful pose (Study 3), and when making a powerful hand gesture (Study 4). This relationship vanished when participants were not exposed to incidental power. A meta-analysis revealed that, relative to a lack of power or a neutral context, exposure to incidental power increased vengeance among the chronically powerless and reduced vengeance among the chronically powerful. These findings add to previous research on relations between power and aggression, and underscore the role of individual differences as a determinant of powerholders’ destructive responses.

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Offense Type as Determinant of Revenge and Forgiveness After Victimization: Adolescents’ Responses to Injustice and Aggression:

Parental Alienation

If given the choice between a broken bone and being dumped by a romantic partner, or between a black eye and being slandered by a close friend, many would seriously consider enduring the physically painful options over those that are psychologically and relationally so. (Barnes, Brown, & Osterman,2009Barnes,C. D.,Brown,R. P., &Osterman,L. L.(2009).Protection, payback, or both? Emotional and motivational mechanisms underlying avoidance by victims of transgressions.Motivation & Emotion, 33,400411. doi:10.1007/s11031-009-9142-4[Crossref],[Web of Science ®], [Google Scholar], p. 400)

https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/15388220.2016.1193741

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Sociopathic stare

Parental Alienation

Look for hallmarks like the contempt sneer, a slight nostril flare, holding eye contact just a few seconds too long, and deep brooding looks that rapidly convert to faces camouflaging deep-seated levels of dark and murky rage from people withASPDaffectations.

If they hold your gaze for more than 5 seconds, understand the most common fantasies or free thought flow patterns most Sociopaths or Psychopaths report include thoughts of sexual domination or destroying their target. What that means is, if they cannot stop themselves from staring at you, they are striving to both capture your attention while secretly planning to use and abuse you.

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Why Are Some Human Beings So Vindictive?

Parental Alienation

Psychologists and researchers believe that human behavior is determined by the genes and the kind of environment we live in. While the role of Nature and Nurture has always been accepted, even the best of upbringing and education couldn’t exterminate the innate vindictiveness of human beings.

It can be discerned in the innocent squabbling of toddlers; it gets sharpened when they grow up to face the competitive world of sports and schooling and slowly it becomes a part of their personality.

Probably the real reason is rooted in the evolution of human race, which had to struggle to survive against all odds and challenging circumstances. In modern times, when people are blessed with all kinds of materialistic and spiritual choices, revenge refuses to slacken its hold on human psyche.

Why? What could be the possible reasons?

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What Does the Phrase “vindictive Personality” Mean?

Parental Alienation

A vindictive person is someone with an enduring need for vengeance.People who are prone to vindictive behavior have a high level of negative emotions, and often take out their anger by hurting their loved ones in some way, via psychological or physical abuse and manipulation.

Vindictiveness is also commonly a result of a personality disorder such as borderline personality disorder and narcissistic personality disorder. Borderline personality disorder is also characterized by excessive and impulsive behaviors, emotional instability, a strong fear of abandonment, self-destruction, paranoid thoughts and unstable self-awareness. Narcissistic personality disorder may include an exaggerated sense of self-value, lack of empathy, self-centeredness, repressed aggression, hatred, envy, paranoid and suspicious thoughts and behavior. A vindictive personality can negatively impact social, family and work relationships.

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