Of course not. But there’s a difference between a values-driven life and an anxiety-driven one. A values-driven life comes out of your values, your core beliefs as an adult of how to be with others. You are kind and considerate and see that we are all struggling on this tiny dot of speck in the vast universe; you treat others the way you’d like to be treated. You do it not because you “should” or because you will feel guilty otherwise, but because it’s your life blueprint.
But along with this, you can say no, take care of yourself as well as others, beassertiveand honest without being aggressive and hurtful. Life is win-win as much as possible.
The anxiety-driven life, on the other hand, makes being nice a way of managing anxiety. You learned to take a nice-stance as a way…
Father of Kevin, Jenvey and Maddie. Being alienated from Maddie due to the fact that after her mother divorced me and remarried she cut me out of my daughter´s life. I then rekindled my relationship with the mother of my boys and since then Melissa is hell bend on allienating and abusing Maddie